Major Ouch.

I was leaving art history class today and descending a flight of wooden stairs about to leave the building .. and ..

I fell.

The first time I've fallen in quite a long time, not counting those creepy dreams I have that make me jerk back into conciousness.

I didn't just fall because of my own klutziness (for once, last time I fell it was when I worked at Taco Bell .. my ass met a freshly mopped floor and I popped both arms out of socket) .. this time I slipped on some spilled Mt. Dew.

My feet flew out from under me so fast I didn't know what had hit me.

I landed with my left leg bent under my ass, and my flip-flop about 4 stairs behind me.

It took me about 5 minutes to straighten my left leg so I could stand, after I muttered quite a few expletives.

People from my class surrounded me, asking over and over, "Are you ok?!"

A hand reached out to helped me stand ..

I said, "Yes, I just need to walk it off .. "

As I was trying unsuccessfully to walk it off, I noticed blood coming from the top of my flip-flop ..

then, suddenly, a pool of blood .. spilling onto the floor.

Disgustingly, I realized it was coming from my toenail =( I had torn it ...

I immediately started shaking at the sight of the puddle of blood and had to sit down.

I now have a bruise on both buttcheeks, my upper right thigh, behind my right shin, and the top of my left foot is skinned. Three toes on my left foot are scraped, and my left ankle and shin are sore to touch and I'm sure will be black by morning. My toe is bandaged and even though I've cleaned it, I'm terrified to remove my toenail polish and see what's actually happened and where it's torn.

But most of all, it was my pride that was bruised. I felt this huge feeling of shame and embarrassment ..

Why though? It was the spilled Mt. Dew's fault. It wasn't my fault.

There was a nurse in the class who bent to look at my toe up close and personal, which made me extremely uncomfy. That's my toes, y'know? I don't want my classmate all up in my toes .. nurse or not.

and it's strange that everyone saw my blood in a fairly nice sized quantity.

I told everyone thank you (I think, I might've missed a few people but I'll tell them tomorrow), and that we'd make a point in class to marvel at all the pretty bruise colors I develop overnight.

From now on in that particular building, ELEVATOR.

The stairs are this beautiful, nice-to-look-at shiny wood. Slick as fuck and it's impossible to tell when it's wet or dry. I'm not the first person to fall there, and I just am really thankful it wasn't an elderly person or my art history professor that fell, because that would have been so much more detrimental.

Tomorrow the vice-president of the university is supposed to check on me with a phone call, since security came and we had to fill out an incident report and all .. y'know, in case I wanted to sue. Which I would never ..

But I plan to tell him that wooden stairs are a terrible idea. They have no grip and they are so sparkling shiny. Someone could be seriously injured on them, much worse than I was.

I couldn't bear to see that happen.