6.16.2006

Because BK sucks and Pulp Fiction quotes = Real Life.


Vincent: And you know what they call a... a... a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?
Jules: They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?
Vincent: No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is.
Jules: Then what do they call it?
Vincent: They call it a Royale with cheese.
Jules: A Royale with cheese. What do they call a Big Mac?
Vincent: Well, a Big Mac's a Big Mac, but they call it le Big-Mac.
Jules: Le Big-Mac. Ha ha ha ha. What do they call a Whopper?
Vincent: I dunno, I didn't go into Burger King.

* * *

Vincent didn't go into Burger King for a very good reason.

It's because Burger King SUCKS.

What the fuck are chicken fries anyway? Or chicken tenders? Last time I checked, chicken didn't have *tenders* (or fingers or nuggets for that matter.) And they also have "Dutch" apple pie. Ok, I've lived in Holland. Their "Dutch" apple pie isn't even close to being Dutch.

The reason I bring up this conversation is because I'm newly kinda trying out the vegetarian lifestyle (the cadaver incident ruined it for me) and when I need to get something on the go, the only real choice around here is Subway, which isn't the cheapest alternative. $4.49 for a footlong Veggie Delite? Yeah, it's good, but it's still kinda steep.

Anyway, the only other place I could think of with a vegetarian alternative is Burger King. They have vegetarian Whoppers. Meaning, they just leave the burger part off.

Doesn't seem appetizing to me.

I went to Kroger last night and I couldn't even find tofu. TOFU! Come on now, for god's sake. It's nothing foreign. Tofu should be everywhere. If I can buy soy milk, why can't I buy tofu?

I wander down the "healthy" meat-free aisles and marvel at what they have that is way out of my price range, and doesn't even contain TOFU!

Why is healthy stuff so damn expensive? Why is the sugary, carby, nasty stuff so cheap?

No fair.

Plus the Burger King is way nightmare-inducingly frightening. Dontcha think?